All dads can agree that, on an instinctual level, one of our most important duties as fathers is to embarrass our teenage children at every opportunity. Providing their food, clothing, and shelter is also important, but nothing beats making your children cringe.
I find one of the best ways to do this is to use their dope slang, sometimes seriously, and sometimes wrong on purpose.
Either way, it drives them insane.
So, to see if I was on the right track here, I ran a little experiment with my four teenage daughters. Out of the blue one afternoon, I sent them each the following in a text (and don’t worry, I’ll explain what it means later in the post):
Me: what’s gucci fam?
Here are their responses:
Daughter 1: “Oh lord”
Daughter 2: Nothing???
Daughter 3: Seriously ? Everyone’s good
Daughter 4: Oh boy. You don’t ask whats gucci, something just is. I think you mean whats good?
I’m still laughing.
Anyway, It's clear I'm a subject-matter expert, so read on, and I’ll take you through 10 terms you can come back to again and again whenever you want to get a laugh at your kids' expense.
1. Let’s take on the above example: “what's Gucci fam?”
This is really two in one. Gucci means something is good, chill, cool, or awesome. Fam derives from family and is a word they use to describe their inner circle. However, there's some nuance. Your kids would only ever use the word to describe their friends, not their family. This one is fun to use wrong.
2. When something surprises you, say you are “shook”
And if you are profoundly surprised, or REALLY shook, say you’re “shooketh.”
3. Say "bruh" after literally every sentence
Also say literally a lot. Literally, Bruh.
4. This is a good time to introduce the “AF” modifier
Many of these phrases can be taken up a notch by adding an “AF” at the end. As in “I'm shook AF.” Yes, it's a little edgy because it stands for “as fuck,” but you're kids are using it, and why should they have all the fun?
5. When she gets upset, tell her she's “being extra”
Extra = dramatic, over the top, etc. “AF” can enhance this one for sure.
6. Say 'lit' a lot
Anything that is great, awesome, or fun should now be “lit.” It's likely you remember this term to mean “drunk" or “inebriated,” but that's not it anymore. Somewhere, in the halls of some middle school, kids gave this one new meaning.
Bonus: Say it's finna be “lit” for even better results. Finna comes from “fitting to” meaning “going to be.”
7. Even better: use 'lit' to describe something pretty basic
"Wow, sweetie. Those cookies you made are lit!" (Warning: she'll be shook.)
8. Sit down to dinner and say this verbatim: "You ain't woke fam. I'm too lit."
Translation: ” You aren't as socially aware/conscious as I am. I am too cool."
9. Give their friends stupid nicknames
Preferably something built off the first letter of their first name. T-bone, J-Bug, L-dog. This one is guaranteed to horrify your kid. Eventually, you'll want to extend this to other family members, including your dog.
10. "I'm not about it" OR “I'm here for it”
This is how your teenager says they aren't into something at all or that they really are.
So there you have it. Have fun with these. Mix and match them to find fun and new combinations and remember there’s no such thing as over-using these phrases.
Let us know how it goes for you.
In the meantime, the only thing better than using dope dad slang is using dope dad slang while wearing this shirt. Check it out: